i hate this feeling.

i feel sick. i feel weak. i feel helpless. im slipping.

i havent done what i’m supposed to today.

im taking advantage of my mom being gone tooo much,

i love this feeling.

i feel strong. i feel in control. im happier.

i did exactly what ED wanted me to do today,

i love being able to get away with this.

(both seem to be going threw my head right now.)


1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Lauren
    May 24, 2010 @ 16:14:53

    Samm…… 😦
    I’m in the same boat with you dear.
    It’s so part of me wants to get better and hates feeling like my life is a blur that I’m spiraling through..but the other part of me loves when I give into my ed…
    it’s a constant battle…
    but i know that you can get through it and do what YOU need..not what your ed wants… you are a strong girl, and you need to do whatever it takes to get better for you..not for your ed…we can do it!!
    ❤ text me if you wanna chat, i think i gave u my number?
    btw im glad youre blogging, yay blogger friends! i just updated mine 🙂


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